these are the confessions of a broken heart
i changed the blogskin.
again for the million time.
i need to learn to make one;
that way im not bored with one that easily.

this is for my dearest friend joanna lim.
who enjoys reading sad sad stories.
don't know why you like it.
i find it depressing.
but here is the story you like so very very much.

the church was filled from wall to wall with people,
the walls painted white with decorations.
the pale pink roses were a stark contrast to the wooden benches
that lined the interior of the church.
A single shadow stood outside the church
gazing at the bride walk up the aisle.

in his mind he was thinking,
i had her; she was mine.
what happened?
maybe you just let her down
so many times that she gave up hope.
taunted a voice in his head.

a pale white face of a girl
with tears streaming down her face
flashed through his mind.
she had begged him to stay with her.
he threw her love for him
out the window;like a wilted flower.

following the masses of people,
he walked out of the church.
leaving the crowd
he gazed at the scenery.
a burst of colour;
the roses came in so many colors
they seemed to blind him
red, white,yellow.

sensing a presence,
he turned around.
only to be dazzled by her.
her milkly- white wedding gown,
in contrast to her raven black hair.
her eyes bright with a hint of sorrow
while she looked at him.


he looked at her and smiled stiffly
"congrats on your marriage"
she looked at him; almost pleadingly.
"isn't there anything else you want to say to me."
his jaw clenched, his eyes cold and unfeeling.
as he told her no.

his mind screamed at him,
she smiled softly,
for a moment her eyes had a flash of unbearable hurt.
but it was gone as fast as it had appeared.

she turned away from him.
her slow measured footsteps seemed to echo in his head.
part of him wanted so badly to ran after her.
and beg her to come back to him.
yet the another half of him,
controlled by pride refused to let him.
and so he remained watching her
walk away from him.

she turned around,
and said softly.
"this will be the last time i see you,
so let me tell you for the very last time
i love you."

his heart stood still,
his body frozen in shock.
he watched her join her new husband and chat
with the guest.

his heart felt as though
someone had smashed it into
a thousand peices and was handing
it back to him.
it was my fault
these four words
echoing in his mind.
mocking him.

his one fault that brought him unbearable regret,
he had lost the only one he would ever love.
to no one except himself.
he had lost her to his pride.
and nothing could be worse then having the knowledge
that he had lost her to himself.

this is so re-edited!!
im learning to write
descriptive essays.
so i took the opportunity
to practice.
my coms going mad on me.

im learning i really am.
to just forget.
cause it hurts less that way.
and wanting you,
only makes it worst.
it kills me.
so i will learn.
i will.
i promise.
to forget.
and to not care.
not anymore.
cause i can't take that kind of pain.